paris stare...

this was my last night in paris. i think.

was it the night before my last? seriously, it feels like it was the last.

i remember i called my daughter afterwards. didn't have "a girl," per se, to call. spoke with some friends.

what's odd is that my server that night saw my camera. we talked about black and white photography. her childhood in greece. the fact she "got into photography" after a boyfriend she had loved to take pictures of her in all states of disrobe.

i just enjoyed the fact i could drink a glass of wine and have a smoke and eat rather late in the night.

i would have normally used my leica mp but due to the fact i blew shutters on both the mp and the m6 ttl, i shot with the trusty fm2 and the zeiss 1.4/50 zf. thing was ... the nikon's shutter was starting to go.

and even though i was a bit bitter about the leica failures and the pending total shut down of the fm ... i could still make a frame.

for whatever reason i had pre-focused on the wine glasses frame center right. didn't touch the lens as my food arrived.

perhaps i'm a dick.

but ... when i saw these two walk in ... i watched.

i could tell she was "just there." i don't think she gave herself enough credit in life to see that she didn't have to "just be there."

she played with her ever-present cigarette constantly.

she drank with a quick pace.

almost as though she was "lubing" herself with alcohol to make it better.

then again, bitch may have just wanted to party.

we made eye contact a few times.

i almost felt like a cat.

i wanted the photo.

i know what i saw.

i knew i didn't have my quick weapon mp.

i knew that shooting at anything less than a sixtieth was risky with an slr.

but i saw the chance.

the emptiness i'd seen previously was right there.

and i pressed the button.

once.

it was one of the photos of the few thousand i made -- not counting the wedding i shot -- which i remembered and wanted to see.

and it was the first time i'd taken a raw set of images and let another person see them for the first time ... with me.

'twas odd for me because the only people who really get to see my work first are professional photo editors ... and it's not "personal work," then again, i shoot almost everything like it's personal work.

and another thing ... you don't need to see his face.

just hers.

and i think you may know the whole story.

or at least a fun one to surmise.

nikon fm2. zeiss 1.4/50 zf. f/1.4. 1/60th. ilford delta 400.

and wankerboy says this lens sucks. amazing to me.